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You are here: Home / Facts about abuse / Get the Facts About Psychological Abuse

Get the Facts About Psychological Abuse

June 8, 2017 by Nora Femenia Leave a Comment

Get the Facts About Psychological Abuse

Yes, psychological abuse is another way of talking about emotional abuse. However, using the term “psychological” can help us break down the facts about how this type of abuse occurs.

How is it psychological?

Psychological abuse is a repeated interaction between two people, in which one person attacks the other’s self worth, social competence (as a mother, child, sibling or worker), and makes that person believe that they are unwanted, unloved, and deeply flawed. When the psychological attacks become routine, the relationship can be defined as abusive.

Psychological abuse is then exactly what it sounds like: an attack on your psyche. Although some people will write this type of abuse off as “still better than being hit,” it is important to see how psychological abusers aim to twist how you see yourself, to the point that they tell you who and what you are. This is a terrible theft of identity, which can make it incredibly hard for you to break from the image of you that the abuser has created.

When overcoming psychological abuse in your life, you must identify this image of yourself and destroy it: if you don’t, you will continue to go through life seeing yourself through your abuser’s eyes, assuming that you are inadequate and undeserving, which can deeply hurt your future relationships.

It is also important to remember that it is the long term psychological effects that can be most damaging in a physically/sexually abusive relationship. Although physical damage eventually heals, the psychological damage that comes with it can take years to overcome.

Something else to keep in mind is that psychological abuse affects many households. According to Facts Court Watch, out of 504 children, 29% had been emotionally abused by caregivers compared to the 9% who had been sexually abused and the 14% who had been physically abused. Facts Court Watch also points out that children who are exposed to marital abuse in the home are affected as if they had been directly psychologically abused.

“Crazy Making” & “Gaslighting”

“Crazy making” is how many people describe an abuser’s tendency to mix abusive behavior with “breadcrumbs” of love and affection, which keeps the victim hanging on for better times by ensuring that the abuser is capable of love (conditional, of course, on the victim being “good”). Another aspect of psychological abuse to keep in mind is “gaslighting.” Here’s a definition from Facts Court Watch:

Perpetrators of emotional/psychological abuse often consciously employ a strategy called, “gaslighting”  in which they present an alternate reality to their victims, police, therapists and judges.  Gaslighting involves denying what occurred, offering plausible but untrue accounts of what occurred, or suggesting the victim is imagining things, exaggerating or lying.   Gaslighting strategies leave victims doubting their own perceptions, memory or sanity and serve to confuse police, judges and therapists into inaction or worse, supporting the abuser, while leaving the victims feeling helpless and alone against the abuse (Forward, 2003; Engel, 2002, Stern, 2007).

It is important that you educate yourself in the possibility of manipulation by other person. This will prevent you becoming a victim of other person’s abusive intentions…

WISHING YOU WELL!

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Filed Under: Facts about abuse Tagged With: abuse in the home, abusive relationship, crazy making, emotional abuse, emotionally abusive relationship, facts about abuse, gaslighting, mental abuse, psychological abuse, psychologically abusive relationship, self-esteem, self-worth, toxic behaviors, verbal abuse

About Nora Femenia

Nora Femenia, Ph.D. Relationship Advisor and Conflict Coach
Helping people see through their current relationship pains and trace a path to a better, richer life, where they can be emotionally satisfied and develop their life purpose with joy and confidence.

? Before offering my experience as a Conflict Coach, I had a successful career as a family therapist for more than 20 years, where I also worked as a mediator and conflict resolver.

? After widening my career to include online coaching I have learned to overcome time and distance obstacles so as to provide reliable assistance to clients around the globe. Experience has shown that in most cases I can help people out of very hard situations by helping them to observe the situation from an external perspective.

? I’m still discovering the laws of the universe concerning why relationships can deliver so much happiness and hold the potential for us to develop and fulfill our life purpose. Each time I discover a new trick, I’m happy because my clients will get it too...
? I have developed, along all my experiences, a direct approach to people’s dilemmas where I can pinpoint where is the pain, and offer fast solutions that work. I care about my clients, so I offer free orientation sessions.

I teach Conflict Resolution at graduate level at Florida International University and do frequent international consulting and training on demand.

?? Email: nora@creativeconflictresolutions.com
?? Twitter: peacewonk
My books are here; http://amazon.com/author/norafemenia
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